Will the real dolphin please stand up?

Sometimes, losing my momentum can be a good thing.

I rush along and rush along, going from place to place and ticking items off my to-do list all the while. But what am I doing? And, more importantly, WHY?

When it comes to my own mothering, homeschooling, homemaking, and personal creative endeavours, the answer is simple. Or at least it is when I have resolved it in my heart. And right now I do – I am resolved to be a present, loving, mother and wife in my family. Because every organization needs someone who cares. That’s my job. I’m the CEO, manager and care-taker.

But I am less clearly resolved when it comes to my work here, at The Parent Vortex, and elsewhere. Why do I write? What is my purpose beyond taking care of my family? Do I need to have a purpose beyond that? Why?

I started a post awhile back and abandoned it, totally turned off by the idea and act of dictating to other parents how they should parent. I want to help parents make changes in their life that feel good and healthy to them, that help their lives and relationships with their children blossom, that make things easier and less stressful. But the more I parent and the more I read parenting books, the more I believe that there is not and never can be a fully comprehensive how-to manual. There is a reason why babies don’t come with a “Care and feeding of your new baby” pamphlet attached to the placenta. Real parenting comes from the heart. It is a highly personal, continually evolving process of nurturing the growing relationship between two human beings. It’s pretty hard to write a pithy how-to article with 5 easy bullet points to elucidate that magical process.

The paradox (and there always is a paradox to these things, which is why I love the vortex imagery so much) is that human beings are also biological creatures with some basic physiological responses that can be measured empirically and observed in a rational way. Relationships and the human spirit have a strong element of the indescribable, whether you call that magic or God or superconsciousness. It’s there, but so are the laws of physics and biology. No parenting manual can explain every individual situation that you might ever come across as a parent, no matter how thorough or well-intentioned the author. But there are some general principles that apply to all human babies and parents. It is each parent’s responsibility to apply these in a responsible, caring way.

I want to help parents understand what those principles are, and how they influence the parent/child relationship. I’m thinking big-picture, with details about biology and physiology as required.

Would you be interested in reading more about these kind of parenting principles? What kind of things do you like reading about here anyway?  What brought you here in the first place?  And what do you think I can safely leave behind in the archives?

{ 5 comments }